I think since I was a child, I've always been in possession of a few Guatamalan Worry Dolls. I'm not really sure by what means they have found their way to me, but my guess is that where there is a need, the Lord provideth. I don't really consider myself a worrywart (the Lord also provideth medication for such things), but as a mother I think it is a natural part of the job to have some sense of anxiety over the uncertainness of our kids' paths and futures. This can be heavily compounded when raising a child with a disability (hence the meds) and J-Boy's autism has certainly kept me up nights.
I heard a story long ago about a man who ritualistically touched the leaves of a tree as he walked up the path to his house every day after work. One day his kids, or his wife-I can't remember-asked him why he displayed this odd, meaningless behavior. He answered that he hangs his troubles from work outside on that tree so that he doesn't bring them into the house with him. I loved that idea, and have kept a small pouch of worry dolls hanging on my headboard for a very long time. Sometimes I give them a gentle squeeze before closing my eyes and handing myself over to sleep.
The next project in the It's Sew Easy online class I am taking from Julie Fei-Fan Balzer was to make a small heart-shaped pillow. Boy, was I feeling uninspired. I really liked Julie's example; the fabric she used appeared to be a well-used paint rag filled with a myriad of mish-mashed color and pattern from many a past project. It had such character; it was so "Julie". I needed the find something that was "me".
I was reading an interesting crime novel recently, House Rules, by Jodi Picoult, a perfect crossover book for me as it chronicles a case --possibly, allegedly-- involving an 18 year old boy with Asperger's Syndrome, a form of autism, who is a crime scene investigation fanatic. (Some of you readers who don't know me personally may find it interesting to know that I worked as a forensic scientist before my son was diagnosed with autism. It became clear that caring for him and advocating for him was a full time job in itself.) The mother in the book made an analogy that got my mind racing.
"Sometimes I think the human heart is just a simple shelf. There's only so much you can pile onto it before something falls off an edge and you are left to pick up the pieces."
With my bag of worry people perched over my shoulder as I read that passage, propped up in bed, inspiration for my heart-shaped pillow finally hit. I immediately unstrung the pouch and was actually surprised at what I found inside it:
Had I literally worried their little heads off????
And, why were the heads of the girl dolls completely gone?
Had I subconsciously transferred my worry-work about J-Girl to these dolls
so I could more consciously worry about J-Boy, ala some kind of
emotional divide and conquer? Weird!!
Anyway, my idea was, with regard to worrying, "A Mother's Work is Never Done." Here were my first attempts for the pillow's design:
Yeah, I wasn't really feeling it. I ordered some new worry dolls (with heads!) from the internet. Here's the final result:
I love it! And there are plenty of worry dolls on there to help me get
these kids through High School, I think!
I'm going to go hang it up on my headboard now!
Good night!
hope you slept well Lisa! Your heart is wonderful and as the mother of a grown daughter with autism I can relate to your tale.
and thanks again for your lovely comments on my projects.
Posted by: Sue | April 18, 2011 at 08:49 PM
Brilliant! Genius! Amazing! I want one! I absolutely love it!
Posted by: Julie @BalzerDesigns | April 18, 2011 at 11:34 PM
It's a small world, isn't it? :) Thank you, Sue!
Posted by: Lisa Flaherty | April 19, 2011 at 07:36 AM
Well, I learn from the best! ;) Thanks, Julie!
Posted by: Lisa Flaherty | April 19, 2011 at 07:37 AM
Wow! These are great!
Posted by: Sharon MLS | April 19, 2011 at 08:06 AM
Oh this is so wonderful!! xxx
Posted by: Lois | April 19, 2011 at 02:17 PM
You really never cease to amaze me! I love your ideas and your final heart pillow, Lisa!
Posted by: Aunt Vicki | April 19, 2011 at 06:17 PM